Monday, November 28, 2005

A Broken Egg!


I caught a cold on Friday, still I did some exercise on my killer new thingy that makes your legs super duper strong and all hot and sweaty I went out with my father to our usual Friday chat to a local cafe, being the winter so damn irregular when Wednesday we were at almost 90ºF, Friday was alot more chilly, around 60ºF, so you must imagine what all of that did to my organism after working out so hard.

Anyway, today I'm feeling all broken, not only because of the cold that's killing my nose and my chest. About a month ago my father called my devastated telling me how bad he felt for being with my mother the way he is, my father is not a as social as my mother is, she loves parties and gatherings with the family while my father is a pure hermith. I really don't understand till this day how was it possible two completely different people can be together for almost 30 years; then again, the saying of "The opossite atract" can apply to this odd couple.

As I was saying before, my father was feeling really bad because my mom one day revealed to him she was no longer doing what he told her to do and she would do what she pleased to do. Those words broke my dad's heart and almost crying over the phone he told me, he made a big mistake by marrying my mother after 30 years.

That broke me in pieces but I glued it all with kinder garden glue when I took both of my parents to a coffee shop and try to get them to talk to each other again with trivial talk, which worked just fine, at least that day; 3 days later my mother tells me by "coincidence she's going to visit her sister to her hometown...for 2 weeks and a half". mother never left my father before for so long, well, except for that time 5 years ago when I started to live my life on my own and she came to visit me to help me out move out of my brother's home, but that's another story.

That kind of surprised me, I mean, my father sounded really bad over the phone 3 days ago and now my mother tells me she's leaving to visit her sister; that didn't sound quite right, but who am I go judge them?

It's been 5 days since my mother left and today my father calls me telling me, maybe it will be better if my mother stayed there for a while longer.


Hell no! Why is he saying that? Again I can hear him by the tone of his voice he is pretty unhappy by the fact that my mother is away and having so much fun at her sister's, and I mean having lots of fun he meant she went to a birthday party were 300 of my mom's family members all gathered together and made a beautiful family party. I've never ever in my life been in such gigantic family parties; and it looks like my mom's family do that too often; she was raised between all that amount of family members so I can understand her happiness of seeing all of them together after 30 years. But it just looks like my father doesn't understand that and doesn't want to understand my mother comes from those roots where all the families join together and are always with each other for better or worst.

My father didn't grow like that, his family is all filled with hatred and racism and more hatred, they never were a united family, worst, neither of them ever wanted to help one another when one of the family members were in need. So he doesn't understand why is family so important.

As my mother had to choose between my father and his family and she decided to go with the hermits, me aswell as my brother were raised with the same family values as my father, which were, "No families are there to for anything but to cause pain, and family members are good for nothing", I can now understand why I am such a social freak, a grouch and a don't like to be around people but, this issue is not about me, it's about my father.

I had a small arguement with him while we were on the phone this morning and he was determined that my mother should stay where her family is and he should stay here, alone.

Was he trying to work into my mind so I could feel pitty for him? Because it's not working, I am sure he wants my mother to come back and wants to do it through me, telling me all of this crap so I can call my mother and tell her my father is feeling depressed because she left him for a party.

Pleezeeee, tho whom is he talking to? One of his own!!! That means, if he wants to die alone, let him die alone I am not going to interfere with his suicidal thoughts anyway.


This bitters me a bit, but it bitters me more that my boss is seeing my dieing here from this miserable cold and he is not telling me to go home...Well screw him, I'm passing my bird flu to everyone in this crappy joint anyway!

Happy Monday Everyone!

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