Monday, October 25, 2004

Icky Monday!

I feel Bleah…

I’ve had a bad sinus headache since Friday and it’s not going away, I want to take my eyes out and put them in a glass of icy water maybe the pain will go away, or I just might have a big brain freeze and drop into a coma. Anything is better than this headache.

Weekend was not nice, me and my big mouth I don’t know when I will learn; first last week oh yeah I told you that already, the Halloween fest, well I cooperated with going out on the weekend and find a good price for the cake and the candy and some balloons and other crap I already bought, but before that I had to get up at 6 am because I had to take my boyfriend’s car to the mechanic shop for break repair. So there went my super Saturday.

Sunday, well, agh! Had to get up early…again, although my head was killing me, my best friend had a little problem with the roof in her house so I asked my boyfriend if he could help, I would have helped but I’m afraid of heights so I left. Went home, cleaned up around the house, lots of dust by the way and I don’t know where that came from; did the laundry and the groceries. So there went the Sunday.

Monday, (yeah I’m not finished yet) we were supposed to get rain until tomorrow but looked like the little clouds wanted to “go” ahead of time. Did I hear that on the news last night? No. Was I prepared with a rain coat? No. So as soon as I walked out of my house and began driving I saw little bits of rain dropping on the windshield, now I couldn’t go back home ‘cause I was already running late. Now guess who’s getting worst with this flu?


The new HR manager was introduced to us this morning (apparently a super freak monster who my father knows since 16 years ago). This new HR manager has a bad reputation around the industry, everybody who worked or has friends who works where she used to work has something bad to say about this woman. We are afraid, especially me, my father worked with her when he used to work in production and my dad resigned the job she used to make war with my dad.

Now, let’s see, my last name is not popular between the masses, actually I’m an nearly extinct specie; we are only a few with my last name in Mexico and we are all family, so this woman as soon as she heard me saying my last name she gave me this weird look of “I’ve heard that last name before somewhere” (yes you have woman! Stay away from me you beast!). The worst thing I heard coming from this woman’s mouth was “I would like to spend some time with each and every one of you to know your functions in this company, especially I would like to focus in the Production Department as soon as possible” And again she gave me “that look”, she even closed her eyes a little bit.

That woman is a witch I tell you, a witch!

Happy Monday Everyone!

Friday, October 22, 2004

Ferocious Friday Quickie!

Yes I am ferocious today…

While everybody’s working over here I am having the time of my life blogging, isn’t work beautiful? Although a few of my workmates already know I just blog all day not because I told them but because they caught me, well actually just one girl caught me, the whiny pants girl I shall call her from now on, if you don’t remember her she’s the Manufacturing Eng. who thinks everybody is stupid except her.

Ok, enough about her, let’s get back to me. So she knows I just blog, and she’s pissed, pissed of the fact she’s a working slave and I am not, (in your face woman!) yeah she’s envious and I can feel the bad vibe going on with her over it so I decided to move away from her and for the rest of the people who surrounds her, so I am going to my loner self again, that means no lunching with anybody but myself and my book.

In other news and to finish this Friday quickie, we’re planning a Halloween fest next Friday, there were supposed to be 5 girls coordinating this and I only see myself and the front desk girl making all the arrangements while the rest of the girls are whistling their way out of it, wait a minute, they said they would participate and they’re not. Alright, no candy for those 3 including whiny pants with her whiny kid.

Move away people, I have a soar throat, my super banana oatmeal shake didn’t work, so it’s official I have the freaking flu (thanks DAD for sneezing on my face and spraying some of your germs over me) and I am not becoming a millionaire. Bleah!

And yes, I am in a very bad mood and just a color away from turning green!

Happy Friday Everyone! (Ashheeee!)

Thursday, October 21, 2004

What if I say Yes!

I think it won’t be good…

Yesterday as I was reading Monkey’s blog I remembered something funny (well not that it is funny but it sounded funny) Last week my dad wanted me to search in the US Embassy the requirements to get a tourist visa so I went to take a look at what was needed; well besides all the papers we have to take there there’s a visa request form that needs to be filled out and we must attach a picture to it as well. Between all the 50 something questions the form has there was a strange section where it asks you very weird questions and in the instructions said that answering Yes did not mean a visa denial but it would require further investigation and questions with a Consular inspector.

These are a few weird questions I found:

Have you ever been detained or convicted for a felony although you have been pardoned, or have been conceded amnesty, or have you been an object of any other similar action? Have you ever distributed or sold controlled substances such as drugs illicitly or have you been a prostitute o have you been a pimp?

Have you tried to get inside the USA to practice export control infractions, terrorist activities or subversive, or any other illicit purpose? Are you a member or do you represent any terrorist organization as stated in the Secretary of the United States of America? Have you practiced prosecutions directed by the Nazi government of Germany or have you been involved in any act of homicide?

Have you ever avoided taxes while you resided in the USA?

Have you suffered from an important contagious decease that could be dangerous to public health, or do you suffer from a mental or physical disorder, have you ever used drugs or are you a drug addict?

Only someone such as a mentally disoriented person would answer yes to any of those questions even if that person really do something such as items 1, 2 or 3.

Ah I kill me!

Happy Thursday Everyone!

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Do you have the Flu?

“Cause I don’t…Suckers….

I’ve been skipping the freaking virus by miracle, everybody in my company had or has it at this moment, everybody sneezes on my face, shakes my hand after blowing their noses, coughs right beside me; my dad has it and the last time I saw him the flu was mean to him, I thought I was going to get it but no, it was a false alarm. This morning I woke up with a wee of a soar throat and a little bit of a drippy nose but right now I just have the drippy kind of scared away and the soar throat disappeared when I drank my banana and oatmeal shake.

Could that be the antivirus for the flu? “Cause if it is I’m a fingernail away from becoming a millionaire.

Thought I gave you all the ingredients huh? Well no! I didn’t mention one, so then again, I’m becoming a millionaire!

In other news…

This “storm” is getting me on my nerves, last night when I came back from work I found my living room almost swimming around the house; some water went inside from under the door which is about an inch up from the floor. So after I found my living room soaked in water, I also found a bunch of cockroaches running around my kitchen looking for a place to hide away from me, ‘cause they know me, and they know I’ll kill them, I’m not a nice person. They think because it’s raining outside they are very welcome to stay in my kitchen and eat my cookies, well they’re wrong, I sprayed half a bottle of bug spray all over the house and guess what? They’re not dead yet.

A while ago I had ants, then I had mice, then I had fleas now I have roaches? I think I could manage all the other bugs but not the roaches, I hate roaches!

So with this little rant I will go away and keep “working” while looking out the window and watch the “storm” that’s hitting us. (I’m containing my laughter at the storm)

Happy Soaked Wednesday Everyone!

Monday, October 18, 2004

Rain Drops are falling on my Head!

And they call it a “Storm”…

Well, as I was saying to my friends the other day, “How come it’s fall and we don’t have cold weather or a little bit of rain?” We began the cold season and the weather’s been changing a lot lately. The weather forecast told us we were expecting rain since 2 weeks ago but seemed like the little cloud passed over and didn’t feel like “going”.

On Sunday night at about 2:00 am I heard a weird noise, like water falling out of a water pipe with strength, I thought it was my toilet that maybe broke a pipe or maybe my washer machine or something and I got up to check what it was. Still I couldn’t figure out what was going on until I checked the window outside, It’s raining?? We were not expecting rain this weekend were we? The weather was very hot in the afternoon and I was wearing sandals because it was too darn hot and now it’s raining? I really don’t get it.

It rained all night and part of the morning, my house woke up with a little bit of water inside the living room so I should figure the wind was quite strong. I turned on the news and what do you know? It was a storm that hit us in the night, I don’t know where it came from but it was a heavy rain. It didn’t cause too much of a struggle in my town although you could see lots of mud and rocks all over the street but besides that, the rest of the town was technically dry because of the 182 days we were without rain.

Poor dirt, it was thirsty.

On the other side, there were lots of damages in my neighbor country the USA. I heard there was some floods and mud slides in some parts of the San Diego county and it didn’t stop raining until later in that day.

I am thinking, if they had the kind of daily storms we are used to get in the South of Mexico; the entire area of California would be drowned under the sea by now. Everybody gets so scared with these puny drops of water that everybody wants to run away in Noah’s Arch.

I said to one of my work mates, why we didn’t get as much rain as the guys in San Diego? And my work mate said. “We are so poor not even the clouds come here for a visit”

That cracked me up.

Happy Monday Everyone!

Friday, October 15, 2004

This is a Friday Quickie!

And so we begin…

At my parents home last night:

Me: Baby we have to go now it’s already 9:30 pm

BF: Ok, let me just drink one glass of water and then we go.

Me: Oh leave that, you’ll drink the water at home, why bother?

(Big A. mistake)

Mom: You’re not going to give him the glass of water??!!!

Dad: Don’t be rude with your boyfriend and give him the glass of water!!.

BF: It’s ok, no problem, really.

Me: Mom, what’s the big fuzz about? Is just water.

Mom: No is not just water, is your attitude and your manners, and your future life; I never taught you to be like that, all women should take care of their men, because marriage…

And so the counseling began, and you really don’t want to know how it all ended after one and a half hours of preaching about how a woman should treat her husband so he doesn’t leave you for another woman who will take care of him better than you. Did I ever mention to them I had the intention of getting married?

Moral of the story:

If you’re at your parents home and your husband/boyfriend/partner/what ever asks you for a glass of water, just give it to him, it will avoid you a sleepless night.

Happy Friday Everyone!

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

A little bit of Me!

As I have nothing to post today...

I found this fourty something items questionaire in Kokoy's page, if I bore you I won't get upset if you leave.

1. What kind of first impression do you think you give people? Of an antisocial freak a Jehovah’s Witness, rude and mean.
2. What's one thing you like to do alone?Talk to myself infront of a mirror.
3. Are you a giver or a taker? I’m an absolute giver, If I take something I must give it back in one way or the other I don’t like to owe anything to anybody. It makes me feel very uncomfortable.
4. What have you stolen before? Once I tried to steal one Frito Lay Chip from an open bag inside a Supermarket but one supervisor caught me, I had the chip inside my stomach by then so I could not give it back. My mom had to pay for the whole bag though.
5. How many drinks before you're tipsy? Half a can of beer and I’m already on the roof thinking I’m Spider woman.
6. Do you ever have to beg? No, I hate that; I rather do things by my own.
7. What kind of books do you like to read?Anything that will get my attention at the moment. Except for those mushy love stories, hate them to death.
8. Do you think you're cute?Yeah, I know because people tell me so all the time. But not that kind of “Cute” being cute like “Oh look at that little puppy” kind of cute.
9. Do you have a problem changing clothes in front of your friends?Yes I do have a big problem with that.
10. What's the most painful experience you've ever had?Finish a 4 and a half year relationship with the love of my life.
11. Favorite communication method? Writing.
12. Do you care? N.O.!
13. What is your most prized piece of your music collection? All my Michael Jackson CD’s
14. What is the geekiest part of your music collection? All my Michael Jackson CD’s
15. What do you eat when you raid the fridge at night? Nothing. I rather not eat; I hate to go to the bathroom at night
16. What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie? The only one “Life is Beautiful” with Roberto Benigni Dec. 11 1998.
17. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done? A Lipectomy and a booby lift.
18. What is a physical habit that gives away your insecure moments? I crack my fingers and bite my lips.
19. Do you know anyone famous? No
20. Describe your bed. A soft and cozy King Size bed with lots and lots of nice and soft pillows oh and a huge body Pillow I just love that pillow is my favorite pillow. Oh yeah, I was talking about my bed, it’s tall too.
21. Spontaneous or planned? Planned, definitely planned.
22. Do you know how to play poker?Kinda but not too much.
23. What do you carry with you at all times? My purse, although I hate to carry it ‘cause it’s too freaking big, it looks like a diaper bag.
24. What do you miss most about being little? Nothing, the nightmare is gone.
25. Are you happy with your given name? Yes, now I am very much, before I hated my name.
26. How much money would it take to give up the internet for 1 year? If it is while at work, my whole yearly salary.
27. What color is your bedroom? It’s cream and white but the curtains are violet matching my quilt.
28. Have you ever been in a play? Yeah, once, and I’ll never do it again, I’m a lousy actress.
29. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself? Yes, I do, very much.
30. Do transient, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you? No, but they make me very sad, dammit, that means I do care. dought!.
31. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person? No, I consider myself a mean careless person.
32. Do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends? No, I spend more time with myself.
33. What's one thing you wish you could do but can't? Make hideous people disappear from the face of this earth with one snap of my fingers.
34. What is your ideal wedding location? As long as I’m getting married I don’t care about the location.
35. What's one instrument you wish you could play? The violin
36. Something you love and hate? My job.
37. What's one language you want to learn? Right now, Farsi, I want to know what my boyfriend’s family has to say when I’m here and I can’t understand a word they’re saying, maybe they’re talking about me.
38. What do you order at a bar? Depends on my mood, Kalua when I’m frisky, or a clamato when I’m feeling spicy.
39. Have you ever pierced your body parts? Do ears count?
40. Do you have any tattoos? Do the fake ones count? I’ve had sticky tattoos the ones that come inside the Cracker Jacks.
41. Would you admit to getting plastic surgery if confronted? Sure, why not? Plastic surgeries are always notorious, I would sound ridiculous if I said no.
42. What's one trait you hate in a person? Hypocrite, I hate hypocrites to death.
43. Do you consider yourself materialistic? Not at all.
44. What do you cook best? Beef with Green tomatoes and chipotle chilli.
45. Do you cry in front of your friends? No, I hate it, I want people to know I’m not a weak person.

Monday, October 11, 2004

Movie Horror!

With my parents it is…

I remember when I was a midget my parents used to take me to the movie theaters and you all might think “Oh how nice your parents were to take you to see your favorite movies”

Hell no!

They used to take me to see their adult movies, of course not all the time were those porn movies but most of the time with adult graphic scenes, sex and all that things kids are not suppose to see because they’re too young. So I guess I got some sort of trauma ever since when watching movies with my parents.

When I grew up and my parents didn’t go to the movies much anymore, they bought their VCR, and it was like being in hell; again, they would rent these movies with violent sex content and stuff I was still not supposed to watch because still I was too young to watch, although I was about 15 or 16 at the time, it was the worst someone could do to me. I mean, at the theater there wasn’t much of a problem because I just figured there were a lot of other kids around watching the same stuff like me and I was not alone, besides the lights were off and with it also was my shame. But when watching movies in your own home with your parents and the lights are on it’s a nightmare; I could not see the movie entirely because every time there was a sex scene I had the urge to get out of the living room and sometimes I didn’t come back to watch the movie, although it was very interesting not because of the sex scenes but because of the story I just felt, sick.

Anyhoo, now as an adult and a knower of the “occult under the blankets” I had my precautions when renting some sort of movies. I always read the synopsis and the rating of that movie and if it seemed family ok then I would rent it and have my parents watch it with me.

So being as precautions as I am, yesterday I made a big ass boo boo. We rented a few movies and between those there was Scary Movie 3 and Monster. I thought, well, I saw both of the Scary Movies and they were pure sex jokes so my parents will not see that one with me I rather watch it alone, and I read the synopsis on Monster and it didn’t read anything bad about it but I ever read reviews or comments from people who already saw it.

So there goes cute little Yoli asking her parents if they want to see the movie and they both agreed. BIG MISTAKE.

Did the synopsis said “Homosexuality and graphic sex scenes displayed”? NO

Did the synopsis said the movie was about a prostitute who becomes a lesbian? NO

Did the synopsis said the movie was about a homosexual couple? (Not that I or my parents are against it but it’s uncomfortable to watch with the family) NO

So with all that, we saw the movie.

Did I enjoy it? NO

Did I understand the story? NO

You wanna know what I did when Aileen and Selby had sex for the first time? I got out of the couch and cleaned up my mom’s kitchen, threw out the garbage and fixed some more munchies.

It was horrible!

From now own I am definitely going to have to read comments, watch the movie myself before them and if it’s suitable for families to view then I will allow my parents to watch it with me. I’m a good daughter aren’t I?

The End

Happy Monday Everyone!

Friday, October 08, 2004

Friday Quickie!

What ever…

Yesterday I paid in full all the time I owed my company. My time off is at 5:30 pm and I got out of there at 7:30 pm. You will say “Yoli doesn’t hold that much” Yes I do, but if I stay over time just to stay over time it kicks right on my grumpy nerve. I stayed over time for nothing, I finished all my work by 6:00 pm and I was about to leave when one of the workers in here said, “oh you can’t leave yet, we still need to add 15 layouts to your presentation, and I’m in layout #5”.

I almost fainted, so I had to stay 1 and half hours there doing nothing, I was really, really green of anger to the point of turning purple.

So just for that, I am leaving early today, my boss is at corporate doing the presentation I fixed for him yesterday so that means he’s not coming back today, which means I get to do what ever I want today, which means I am off at 4ish almost 5ish. Hurray for me!

In your face Nutter Industries!

Happy Friday Everyone!

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

I think I’m gonna geddit!

Freaky ass weather…

I’ve been trying to get away from the flu since the weather changed last week. Suddenly from one day to the other, we were at 100 degrees and the next day we went down to a 75, and it’s been up and down ever since.

Last week I spend one whole day sneezing my brains out until I think I sneezed the germ out too and the sneezing was gone. Last night the same, I started feeling a little bit cold and dizzy, last night as much as I snuggled under my boyfriend’s arm I could not get myself any warmer and I was awake since 4 am. This morning I got out with an itchy nose and a weird scratchy throat, so this mean the germ attacked me again while I was sleeping, why didn’t anybody told me?

I’m not sneezing, I just feel shivery and scratchy and it’s getting me on my nerves now. Actually I am completely grouchy today, so nobody should talk to me.

My mom sells food as a hobby, she makes what ever you want her to fix you and she’s an excellent cook by the way. My whiny co-worker knew about my mom so she asked for some food for today, I gave her the dish and where is the money? Still in this woman’s pocket of course, I saw her coming and going in and outside my office like 10 times this morning and every time she saw me she said “I’ll pay you right now” (typical Mexican sentence by the way which should never be trusted not even to your closest family members). Yeah right!

I’m great at asking for my stuff back, to the point that nobody owes me anything, not even a paper clip. So with this gift that god has given me as soon as I saw her coming back I said to her “Ok, are you going to pay me with the exact amount or do you need change, because I don’t have change and I need to look for it” to which she replied, “Oh no I have here” “Ok, then I’ll go with you right now to get the money”. And so she had to give me the money because I was so stuck to her like a tick I did not get away from her not even a second.

Of course that made me feel more grumpy; oh well, people will have to deal with me as I am.

But I’m not getting green yet, though I ate green chillis for lunch.

Happy Tuesday Everyone!

Monday, October 04, 2004

Anniversaries My ^$$!

I don’t know why ours always suck…

I have no idea how on earth every celebration I share with my boyfriend are always disastrous, but they always are. I remember our first Valentines Day, I planned a very romantic dinner, unfortunately that day my boyfriend also finished the paper work for my current car which I bought that same day; the day since early morning was horrible with lots of obstacles but I got the car and a big migraine for a bonus, my boyfriend had a hard day at work too; we got home at around 11:30 pm and both were exhausted and very hungry so I didn’t cancel the dinner, I made crepes with mushroom dressing with nice decorations, when I took the crepes over the table I found my boyfriend snoring on the couch, he didn’t wake up until the next morning.

The second valentine didn’t end up as bad as the first one but it was also weird and not as I thought I planned it. You know, the naughty things I hear on TV I thought I would do it too, so I bought whip cream, fruit, marshmallows and some drinks. It came up my boyfriend is lactose intolerant and I didn’t know that and the whip cream was made out of cow milk and well, I ended up with stomach pain from too much sweet.

Our first anniversary I gave my boyfriend a nice watch, which 2 days later he dropped by accident, the machinery inside was broken and there went the gift.

My boyfriend forgot my birthday two years ago, so you can imagine how that went.

This year, our anniversary passed, I had nice suggestions from Momlady, boo, and Joel, so I tried all three.

Momlady suggested me to have a bow on myself and be mushy and romantic; I’m not Ms. Romance but I thought what the heck.

Joel said a foot rub and a back massage, I always give my boyfriend back rubs and foot massages because of his difficult job in his company, but still I could put some spice in there so I thought of something nice to accompany the bow and the body massages.

Boo gave me a thought of pampering the boyfriend and being romantic, and of course I thought of lots of things.

I called my boyfriend later in the afternoon to double check if he would come early so nothing would destroy the night and good thing I called. My boyfriend brought the recovered car back to the house along with the other car he said he would pass me and that car would be driven by no other but his nephew who stayed over for the night.

So there, my anniversary went away, no bow, no massage, no dinner and no nothing.

I think I'm cursed with this guy.

Happy Monday Everyone!

Friday, October 01, 2004

Rootie Tootie Fresh and Fruity Friday Quickie!

Took me years of practice to learn how to say that...

Yesterday afternoon out of my boredom as I didn't have any work work to do because my boss was out of the office I went "Googling" around, I wrote "Yoli" on the search bar and found twenty something pages about me. I discovered I have like 20 beauty parlors, 3 butcher shops, 2 coffee shops, I am a famous musician and actress, a famous athlete, I have like 10 porn web sites and at the very bottom was my weblog.

The Google search engine I have at work is in spanish so my weblog had the text of "translate this page" right next to it, and well I hit the little button and my blog was all translated into spanish, though it didn't make any sense and actually sounded hilarious I am not able to share that with you but I will try and do my best to show you how it would sound like to have my blog translated from spanish to english.

This is the description of my blog at the bottom of the title Egg Yol!

Egg Yol!
Splat one egg in the floor and what do you obtain? Now splat I in am above and what do you obtain? No you even cause on the attempt, if you do it, Me hit the egg yolk with the foot of you. Grace of me while I am pleasant!

If that's how I really sound like to you, someone shoot me in the head please

Happy Friday Everyone!